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Why Must We Put Up With These Insane People?

FOREWARNING: This page does contain information/rumours/silliness that may be considered offensive or controversial.  These are just snippets of things I've heard, purely meant for enjoyment...Well, they could be true, but we're not really sure, now are we?  :)  Things that I found amusing will have a dollar sign ($) next to them.

~Does anyone find it rather peculiar that at the end of this war on Iraq, all of the oil from Iraq went to the very same company that Dick Cheney was president of before he entered politics?
 
~$$$Crossing Jordan being kept off-air by NBC until next spring is not a coincidence, it's a conspiracy!  $$$
 
~George W. Bush could possibly get impeached if someone raises a fuss about the whole, "'Iraq has dangerous nuclear weapons,' but we never found any" thing.
 
~JFK was not assassinated by Lee Harvey Oswald.  Case closed.
 
~$$Area 51 does indeed harness aliens.$$
 
~$$$George W. Bush is not an alien from Area 51, but a robot.$$$
 
~Why does the government claim that there is nothing inside Area 51, yet they shoot you dead if you get too close?
 
 

Meep!  --My official battle cry